i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Randomize
