the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
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