Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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