So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
Randomize