Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
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