Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
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