TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
