we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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