p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Randomize
