The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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