He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
We need to get me chipped asap
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
Randomize
