grandma shit on top of the toilet
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize