Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
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