Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Randomize
