My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Randomize
