Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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