College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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