My brain says no but my pants say off.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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