Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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