he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
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