You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
