you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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