i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
