I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize
