Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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