Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
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