Just fell off a train. Bad.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
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