You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Randomize
