no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
