Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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