I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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