Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
