i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
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