just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
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