No awkward lesbian experiences without me
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
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