I'm really into asian looking animals
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Every concussion has its silver lining
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
I just want nice things and good sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize