Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
I think I just shit out all my problems.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
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