broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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