Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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