He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize