Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
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