so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Randomize
