i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
