he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Randomize
