Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Randomize
