They should really pass out barf bags in church
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
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