Pappa wants mamma naked
I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Randomize
