are you still at the devil's house?
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
Randomize
