Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
I won't apologize to a one balled man
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Randomize