ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Randomize
