I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
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