Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
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